


MKDR

by wallstoothin



Series: P5 one shots and drabbles [4]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: Based on a Vocaloid Song, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, MKDR, One-Sided Attraction, One-Sided Relationship, Or Is It?, but like not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:54:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25323469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wallstoothin/pseuds/wallstoothin
Summary: Akira wonders 'What does a perfect relationship look like?"
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Series: P5 one shots and drabbles [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1766614
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	MKDR

**Author's Note:**

> yes after the song, you can also think of the title based on the english name DSCF (Delusion Sentiment Compensation Federation) but not really.
> 
> Small mention of P5R but it's just me saying "Oh Akira didn't have the right conditions for the third semester to happen"

Akira remembers dating a girl in six grade. She was pretty. The prettiest girl in the whole grade. At least that’s what every boy in his class said. He doesn't get it. He really don’t. Rika-chan looks just the same as every other girl in the class. Black hair that is fixed as one big ponytail and hazel color eyes she looks just the same as everyone else in town. 

But then out of nowhere Rika-chan approached him after school. A note in her hand, her hips swaying side and side pretending to look nervous put really she look more like a mine trying to hula-hoop. “Hey Kurusu-kun?” She called out shyly. She stopped fidgeting. Young Akira mentally frowned, the hoop falls and it looks like she’s not picking it up and try again anytime soon. 

“Yeah?” 

He underestimated her because she started moving from side to side again.” I um..Do you want to be my boyfriend?”

“Huh?” 

Behind him, Akira can hear the holler and the whistling from his fellow classmates. Dating? That mean going to different places and holding hands right? His allowance is only 2000 yen he’s been saving up to buy a new game there’s no way he can afford something dumb like dating. 

Beside he sees how his parents act whenever they talk about dating - acting all gooey and mushy mushy. If Akira started dating will he turn all mushy mushy too? Will he have to marry Rika-chan?

Rika-chan is starting to look at him funny too and his classmate is yelling at him to say yes. Akira squeezed his eyes shut and sigh in defeat. “Ok. I’ll be your boyfriend.” 

Rika gasped and...great now the girls are squealing . “Really!” Rika threw herself at Akira forcing him in a hug. “Thank you Akira. I love you!”

Love?

From that day on Rika-chan approached his desk before and after school. Telling him all about what girlfriends and boyfriends are suppose to do, and as the list grows bigger and bigger Akira wonders if he bit off more than he can chew. 

He’s not allow to talk to other girls - not without Rika’s permission. His mom is ok because she don’t count for some reason.

He can’t play with his friends for too long he need to spend a lot of time with Rika.

And all of his game money all went to Rika-chan and her many many whims. Stuffed animals and dates where he have to hold hand and call her dumb names like ‘honey’ and ‘darling’ while all his friends play the game he wanted without him. 

When he complained to his dad one evening the traitor only pat his shoulder and said something about young love. His dad also gave him money but all of that went to Rika wanted the new Jack Frost doll that Akira had to win at a crane machine. 

But the kisses are the worst. Rika put on too much lipstick and kiss him on his cheeks and lips. In return Akira gives a little ‘chu’ on the back of her hands. It’s never enough and Akira never felt more trapped in his life. 

So when Rika had to move away because her grandparents are sick. Akira waved goodbye in satisfaction. ‘Good Riddance’ he thought. Maybe now he can start a life. 

His life started and then it was put on indefinite hold. A hiatus if you will. A hiatus due to misfortune events that Akira had no control over. (You could say that Akira had the choice on that night. He could have been like everyone else and went home but he was not like that. ) And with a sprinkle of magical girl anime plot Akira found himself in another relationship. 

Goro was different from Rika-chan. There’s not as much hand holding. Some kissing here and there, sometimes they have a little more. But as time goes by. Akira can’t help but to question their love. 

He was smarter or at least he would like to think he’s smarter than his 12 year old self. He knows what love is. He felt love on that night after all. But still it doesn’t feel right. But he never really try to question it too much. It was all for the sake of Goro. 

When he first got the glimpse of Goro’s true self where Akira receive his first present- a leather glove. He didn’t expect him to confess him love as well. It was just...Goro seem pretty Tsundere. His pride was big and his ego not that far behind. Seeing him pretend to hula hoop after such a passionate declaration as rival doesn’t seem very in character of him. 

But then again, he just met Goro’s true self. He don’t know anything about Goro's true self. This could be just who he is inside. Akira tilt his head as he watch Goro’s face turn redder to the point where he wonder if the older boy had a fever. This confession was not as nice as Rika-chan's; there were some insults thrown, a curse word or two. But just like with Rika-chan he accept and once again he took the role of ‘boyfriend’. 

Goro was needy in a different way. Instead of telling him exactly what he needs like Rika-chan. Akira had to pick apart his body and facial expression. Was his arm slowly inching closer and closer to Akira, then Goro probably wanted a hug or to be held. Was there an extra pillow on the bed? Understandable, it was a stressful day and Goro just needed someone to tell him sweet nothing under the heavy blankets. 

But there were time where Akira really didn’t know what to do. Instead of doing anything to help he spend nights huddle on the couch holding warm coffee close to his chest while Goro threw around the desk and chairs screaming words that no longer sounding Japanese and something a wolf would howl in the dead of the night. 

And how is he supposed to interpret November? 

What is he supposed to believe, the sneer on his face or the tears in his eyes as he pointed a gun directly at him. Before the mission the team each gave him sad eyes and pat him on the shoulder. But he still don’t know what to feel. 

In the end Goro still cared for him. The tears on the ship said it all. But even in love making or in conversation Goro always had the last word.

“I couldn’t make you fall for me, couldn’t I, Kurusu.” 

Goro was always great at interrupting his unspoken words. 

“Heh, just as I thought.”

A gunshot

The clatter of the falling shutter 

And two more shots before Goro signal fell out of Oracle’s radar. His knees also fell out too - not literally of course. But Akira still found himself on the ground holding on to the glove in his hand. 

In the end, he still don’t know how to feel about love, and because he never reached out to a certain someone. He will never know. *****

He feels...empty.

***Akira never completed Maruki’s confidant meaning the third semester never happened.**

**Author's Note:**

> I'm pretty sure there are proper words to describe Akira but I'm afraid that I don't know them. If you know the right words please let me know. 
> 
> This is something I wrote on a whim while Ham's version was playing in the background but instead of the 'girls' POV you get the guy who I fixed to apply to Akira. Also Rika-chan idea of dating was based on what she sees on Tv and since they were both 12 when they started 'dating' I decided not to tag it in. 
> 
> If you wish to see more or like chat or something my tumblr name is the same as my name here so you can check it out. I write little Persona drabble that makes no sense out of context.


End file.
